Well I left my beloved husband in wyoming today. with heavy heart, i sent him off to work, cleaned the trailer a little so he could come home and make food and talk with the kids. and drove the 5 1/2 hrs to corinne. I walked into my house, and sighed. all my energy left me. can i do this? how do people do this? i know this is just till dec..and yet i want to break down crying. can i handle being a single mom till then..knowing there is no one to lean and and support me? no one to snuggle up to at night and hold me and tell me its ok? I have never felt so alone :(
I didnt realize how much just seeing him everynight meant to me. its like the absense of him hangs heavily in the air. like the whole house is sad because he is gone. And here i am going to try and maintain an order of peace and happiness while my heart is broken...as i left half of it in wyoming with him. i pray he is safe. and that he feels the love i have for him tonight. i pray he knows he means the world to me and that me and the kids feel a big loss without him. yet we know he is doing this for us. to help us survive. i love you nathan david d'hulst. forever your baby natasha
2 comments:
This was beautiful but you CAN do it. You'll adjust and be ok. Look at my niece. She has 3 kids. One a new born and the one with autism. Her husband is in the army and is stationed in Cuba for a YEAR!!!
You can do this. You are not weak. You can do anything you put you mind to.
Make this time a time to grow and expand yourself. Learn to appreciate your own strengths. Learn to be strong without him. You will learn to rely on HF 100%. This will be very good for you and you are not alone, without friends who love and care about you.
Don't wimp out. Don't be chicken. Rise to the occasion. Pick yourself up by the boots straps and make your hubby proud of you! Don't make him feel bad for doing this, as though he HAS to take care of YOU. YOU CAN DO IT!!!!
I LOVE YOU!!!
o.k. I don't know how I've missed all of these posts! I have an automatic update on my computer and it never told me that you updated. I'm sorry. I know exactly how you feel. It's very lonely. The kids suffer, you suffer. Not fun. It does make you appreciate them a lot more.
Let people help you. Let friends help take care of the kids. Try to get out and get a break. (easier said than done, I know)
Just keep reminding yourself that this isn't forever. Let me know if I can help. Love you Tash
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